10/31/14 - 11/2/14
10/31/14: Halloween is the time where most people gorge on candy, and they will continue to do so until their left over candy is gone. For some people it will take a few months. For others that might take only a week. Halloween is my favorite time of the year because you can dress up and be whom ever you want. The candy part isn't so bad either. Well, it used to not be so bad. July is when I started my vegan diet, and I wanted to continue strong. I wasn't going to let candy control me.
I was going strong for the entire day until my parents brought out the candy around 7pm. I failed within five minutes of seeing that candy. It was impossible for me to resist the skittles. They are my favorite candy. I ripped open three miniature bags and shoved them in my mouth without a care. After they were completely eaten, that's when I felt the guilt. I had failed. Reluctantly, I straightened out one of the wrappers and checked the ingredients. Everything on there seemed to be okay. It was just sugar, and it was gluten free. But then, I saw that they contained all these different types of dye and remembered that red dyes are made from beetles. So, yeah, I really did fail.
I realized that there is no reason to hang on my mistakes. I am human, so I'm bound to screw up once in a while. A few bags of skittles isn't going to kill me. All I need to do next time is resist harder, and get back on track. And, one method is to separate myself from the candy--put it some place where I cannot get to it like in high places since I am short, and because I am a lazy person, I won't attempt to get it. So, I gave it to my mother and brother. My brother constantly locks his door, and the key is always placed somewhere high. Problem solved. As for my mom, she just puts it on my dad's dresser which is so tall that I would need a chair to stand on top of to get it. No thank you.
This probably sounds childish to some people, but when it comes to skittles, I can't help myself. It's horrible. I know.
11/1/14: Saturday, I was able to get up and eat a 6 banana smoothie. My stomach felt yucky, and it was probably due to those stupid skittles. I still craved them too. I really hated that. It was hard to eat anything during the rest of the day because of how much my stomach hurt. Well, I guess it is good that I learned my lesson now instead of on Monday when I have school. Somehow, I managed to get four papers done for school in 9 hours and 50 minutes. Not bad if I say so myself.
11/2/14: Today started out great. I woke up, and ate a 10 banana smoothie, and didn't crave any skittles. This was probably because I received enough carbs for the time being. On Friday, I don't think I had enough carbs, which is why I reached for the skittles. I wasn't able to eat the 10 banana smoothie for breakfast like I usually do because I was in a rush to get to school. I accidentally spent too much time preparing my Halloween outfit for the day, and I wanted to get there early to study for my cultural geography test.
But, anyway, that was the cause now that I look back. If I don't eat enough carbs, I will look for other shortcuts to get the sugar I need like vegan breakfast bars, which are not the best thing because they are very fatty and are not made out of simple foods. Also, they are not very good for you. And, obviously, skittles are not an adequate source for energy because it will quickly burn out. Bananas keep me going strong all day.
Around 3pm I went grocery shopping with my dad, and let me tell you how frustrating it was. I know what I want, and I tell him. Usually, it is not a problem, but today it was for some reason. All I wanted was a thick vegan soup, but no, I wasn't allowed to get it because he just assumed that I wouldn't like it. I haven't even tried it yet, and I only picked one. Or the freaking sweet potatoes, I just wanted three of them to hold me over for the week; but, no. they were 30 cents more that what we usually get, and I offered to pay. Then, he just yelled at me and acted like I was stupid.
As we get to the car to load up our stuff, he starts yelling at me, saying how I can't live on this lifestyle for the rest of my life. Yeah...Um... I'm 21 years old and can do whatever the hell I want. It has been about five months and except for the skittles thing on Halloween, I haven't completely failed, and I am not going to because I know if I do I will go back to severe stomach issues, bad mental health, and just overall bad health. No thank you. I plan to be healthy and live a strong life for a very long time.
